Sexploration!

I believe that safety, joy, love, and pleasure are a fundamental human right as much of a need as food and shelter. Despite this, 1 in 6 women and 1 in 33 men have been sexually assaulted or raped in their lifetime. Abuse victims experience disrupted relationships, loss of interest in sex, fear responses, depression, flashbacks, feelings of losing control and being “dirty,” and a host of other mental health conditions. If this is you, I want to say that I am deeply sorry for what happened to you.

I help people like you find joy, love, and pleasure for perhaps the first time by looking closely at how your experiences have impacted your beliefs about yourself and the world. I am a childhood sexual abuse survivor, and my healing through complex post-traumatic stress disorder has come through accepting that I can not change the past or what happened to me, but I can change my perspective about it.

Negative experiences in life cause you to develop negative opinions about who you are and how the world works. Over time, these opinions become beliefs, so interwoven into your identity that you often mislabel them as facts. To heal and change, you must be willing to introduce new evidence that contradicts your current beliefs. You’ll need an open mind, a brave heart, and a curious soul to venture into the unknown in search of what you may have thought was lost forever.

• Are you a survivor of sexual abuse?

• Did you grow up in religious environments that taught purity culture and the disempowerment of women?

• Do you crave hot, wild, and unbridled sex?

• Do you experience unexplained low libido?

• Do you experience shame, fear, or guilt when it comes to pleasure or your sexuality?

• Do you avoid open conversations around sex that could lead to better, more fulfilling intimacy?

• Has traditional therapy felt unhelpful or even made things worse when it comes to your sex life?

who is this for?

• Anyone looking to dismantle the shame or fear around their sexuality brought on by religious control, purity culture, rape, or relationship trauma.

• Anyone who needs a safe place to explore their sexual needs and desires openly.

• Anyone who struggles to understand and communicate their sexual needs and desires to current or potential partners.

• Those with a history of sexual abuse where traditional therapy has proved unhelpful.

What to expect:

Boundaries:

Personal boundaries are the foundation of our work together. They are also the foundation of safe and fulfilling sexual relationships.

Trust:

If boundaries are the foundation, trust is the glue that will hold it all together. Trust must be built and established over time. Make me earn it.

Self-Discovery:

On your own time and at your own pace, we will explore and rewrite the beliefs you’ve adopted over the years about yourself, your sexuality, and the world. Past sexual trauma, unhealthy relationships, religious indoctrination, and cultural messaging around sex can dampen the wild parts of us that crave pleasure, joy, and love. Together, we will uncover the truth by dismantling the misconceptions.

Communication:

Exploring your sexuality will lead to the discovery of wants and needs. I will teach you healthy and effective ways to communicate these needs with a partner. You will even practice them with me before going out into the world!

Disclosure:

 I am not a licensed counselor or therapist; I do not have the same self-disclosure policies. I might share a personal story that relates to what you are going through. My candidness encourages a sense of connection and can reduce the shame/guilt that often occurs around sexuality.

Privacy: 

Both of us will share intensely private and intimate information on our calls. What is said on our calls stays on our calls unless the other gives expressed consent.

A laid-back environment:

I offer genuine care, connection, peer support, and guidance, NOT counseling. You can expect me to be dressed in something comfy on my couch as we chat and get to know one another more deeply. I highly encourage you to show up however you are comfortable, whether wrapped in a blanket or enjoying the sunshine on the patio.

Online appointments only: I offer virtual appointments only. Virtual appointments increase safety, anonymity, and privacy, allowing us to dive deeper into the work.