If you started reading this thinking I was going to give you yet another useless box to squash yourself into as a man, I will happily let you know that is not my approach. Masculinity is a hot topic these days as so many of us are beginning to question gender norms, toxic patriarchal teachings, and wooey spiritual spaces like tantra and the God/Goddess movement.

How and where do you learn intimacy? Well you learn intimacy how you learn all things, from your surroundings, experiences and environment. You learn about connection and intimacy in the very early years of your life. This is when our attachment styles begin to form. They form as you go through life as a very small child who doesn’t have words or a frame of reference for relationships yet. You don’t know what's healthy and unhealthy.

Ask most men and they will tell you intimacy is another word for sex. In my work as a professional girlfriend you’ll see a lot of confusion around this. Cuddling is often seen as code for “sex” even if the provider is actually offering cuddles. “Do you offer GFE (girlfriend experience)” is often used as a request for no condom use and anal sex.

It's no surprise that male loneliness is on the rise. “US men are rapidly getting lonelier and staying single, with 15% not even having one close friend” says Julia Pugachevsky from Businessinsider.com When ignored loneliness can begin to affect one's whole life including mental and physical health. So how do you keep it from getting to that point?

People pleasing is one of those things that will slowly kill you from the inside out. One little inauthentic “yes” here, one little “yes” that you instantly regret there and before you know it you have been swallowed up by a life you…